Why we can’t say NO 11/1/2016

Why do you think we can’t say an outright NO unlike people abroad? I   asked my husband  even as we were having a cup of coffee recollecting   the talk we attended recently.

Probably  because we don’t wish to offend anyone by a blunt NO, said my husband .

Which means  we don’t  say what we really have in mind, I said.

Precisely, glad you got the point, he said feeling happy.

I feel the  reason is something deeper than that, if you think about it, I said, not satisfied with his explanation.

Like what? He said raising his eyebrow.

For instance, as children we were expected to agree to what ever our parents said and also not to ask questions, which meant  questioning  their authority, I said.

Could be, but you forget that we did say no whenever we didn’t like to eat something our mother would try to forceon  us, he reminded.

Yes, I totally agree but  a domestic situation is different from a business situation, where an outright yes or no, is very essential, I  argued.

Like  what?

For instance when we purchased our new fridge, the salesman said it would be delivered the very next day , but we received  it only after three days, that too after reminding him of his promise. He could have easily said it would take three days instead of making a promise which he could not keep,  I said.

Habits die hard, irrespective of the situation especially in our country, he quipped.



2 thoughts on “Why we can’t say NO 11/1/2016

  1. v.n.k.kumar

    One of the very well-constructed skits I have read on your site. Aggressive people who do not care for other people’s needs and are very self-centered often say ‘No’, Passive people who care too much for others’ needs & don’t bother about their own needs can never say ‘No’. People have to be trained to be assertive so that they can take care of their own & others’ needs as well in real time and such persons can say ‘No’ without hurting others or their own interests. This is done through proper intonation, smile & friendly body language. Coming to your skit, Indians because of their philosophy ” Athithi devobhava’, “Vasudhaiva kutumbam” could never say “No’ to the foreigners and got enslaved by the aggressive colonizers whether mughals or British!

  2. good explanation nodoubt, but high time we realise our worth.When we went on our European tour ,the tour escort was ill equipped to educate us on the tourist spots we visited and when I wrote a complaint to COSMOS,demanding refund of part of our money charged, they returned 100 pounds .

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