What have you learnt in the session you attended? asked my husband soon after I came home from the three hour session on Etiquette.
Quite a lot, I said, the sweet voice of the speaker still ringing in my ears.
Why don’t you tell me a few of the “do’s” and “don’t’s” regarding the rules of etiquette, he said.
I found the lady had a new approach to the rules. She started first with the don’t’s, I will quote her verbatim if you are interested, I said.
Yes, be brief, he emphasized.
Rule 1. Please don’t switch off your mobiles as I can understand how important it is for you to make calls or receive calls while the session is on.
Rule 2. Don’t hesitate to have a long conversation on your mobiles if you so wish.
That’s strange, she appears to be a queer person, interrupted my husband.
Wait, please have patience and let me complete, I said.
O.K. go on, he sounded irritated.
Rule 3. Don’t feel embarrassed to leave the hall while the session is in progress.
Rule 4.Don’t hesitate to engage in cross talk with fellow participants even while I am speaking.
The lady appears to be off her head, butted in my husband before I could continue.
Rule 5. Don’t think twice to place your feet on the chair in front of you if it is vacant.
Now, I think YOU must be off your head to have sat through such gibberish, quipped my husband.
Why don’t you let me finish? I insisted.
Rule 6. Don’t hesitate to interrupt me if you have any doubts. I shall be happy to clarify them.
You mean to say you people sat through all this nonsensical talk of hers for three hours?, he appeared disgusted.
We had to because we paid through our nose to learn the rules of Etiquette, I said.
Through “my nose”, he corrected me.
O.K. forget the rest of the don’ts, mention at least one “Do” according to her, he said.
Now, you seem to ask a very pertinent question and I too did the same getting tired of listening only to the don’ts, I said.
You will be disappointed with the answer, I warned him.
I don’t need to be disappointed any further, she would have said something equally ridiculous, he mocked.
No, for once we all thought she sounded very sensible when she said, “Please do stay for the twelve course lunch which immediately follows the session and collect your certificates of participation .”
Ah, now I understand why she charged such an exorbitant fee, the 12 course lunch at the Star hotel would have been certainly worth the amount she collected!he observed.
N. Meera Raghavendra Rao